Blue Christmas @ Near To The Knuckle

“Why was Father Christmas upset when he got a sweater for Christmas?”
I shrug.
“Because he was hoping for a screamer or a moaner.”

Blue Christmas was the third of my three festive crime stories to go live last year, when it was published by UK crime site Near To The Knuckle on Christmas Day!

Funnily enough, my first ever NTTK story was a Christmas story too: Christmas Eve Can Kill You.

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All I Want For Christmas Are Your Two Front Teeth @ Spelk Fiction

“The barman at the Cock & Whistle is the least jolly-looking motherfucker I’ve ever seen wearing a Santa hat. I pay for my pint and back away, slowly — he is nursing a baseball bat wrapped in tinsel. I don’t know if he is trying to scare off the carol singers, or the wiry Glaswegian who sells shower gel, bacon and socks out of a Slazenger hold-all.”

Last month saw my festive flash piece All I Want For Christmas Are Your Two Front Teeth go live at excellent UK site Spelk Fiction.

If you dig it, I had a Christmas story up at Spelk in 2015 too: Christmas Is Going To The Dogs.

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Slay Ride @ The Flash Fiction Offensive

“I jerk awake as the Motorola twitches in my pocket. The ringtone is motherfucking Jingle Bells. I’m face down in an alleyway, Santa suit splattered with fresh excrement and stale fast-food waste. I struggle to make out the caller ID because my right eye is swollen shut.”

Last month I was delighted to have my new story Slay Ride featured in the Flash Fiction Offensive’s inaugural ‘Twelve Daze of Christmas’ series, as curated by FFO co-editor Hector Duarte Jr.

Other participants included Ryan Sayles, Paul Heatley, Paul D. Brazill, Patrick Cooper, Cal Marcius, Nicola Hardy, John Weagly, Beau Johnson, Paul Greenberg, Preston Lang and John Ryan, so make sure you stick around and investigate the rest of the stories!

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